It may be difficult, but co-parents can work together to protect their children’s physical and emotional wellbeing over the coming school closures and ongoing COVID restrictions. Here are strategies to make that happen.
Care For Yourselves
Follow the best practices provided by your public health department.
Practice good self-care by eating well, getting outdoors, exercising, and getting enough sleep
Play, it’s important for you and your children’s emotional and physical health and who doesn’t need more joy and laughter.
Be Transparent
Be honest with your co-parent about any exposure to the virus or any self-isolation orders that you must follow.
Share any symptoms that you or the children may have experienced and the medical advice you are following.
Be Flexible and Creative
Do what you can to make sure your children have ongoing reassurance and care from each parent. Loss of physical contact with a parent may be necessary, but loss of emotional support, reassurance and nurturing should not.
Many parenting plans allow parents to alter their schedules by agreement. If this is true for you, consider adjusting your parenting schedule to make spending meaningful time with each parent more feasible.
Lower your expectations. Children and teenagers (and their parents!) may feel like the world is wildly beyond their control. Anxiety and loss make it hard to follow routines so consider how manageable and necessary your plans really are.
If you can’t physically be with your children try one or more of the many fun options to connect/play with them (See play suggestions at the end of this post).
Talking with Your Co-Parent
(see post from September 20, 2021)
As always, pick a time to talk that works for both of you. Ensure that your children are not able to listen in.
Prepare an agenda of topics to discuss. Keep it manageable.
Remember you are not making demands but are exchanging proposals. Some proposals need tweaking so don’t dismiss them without considering ways to adapt the initial proposal.
Don't make assumptions about what is happening in the other household ask curious questions instead.
If you agree to changes in your routine follow-up with emails confirming what those changes are.
If flexibility or changes aren't possible, stick to your existing Agreement or Order
If you are concerned that the other parent is not following safety protocols, review your concerns with a lawyer before disregarding the existing agreement or court order.
Ways to play & connect if you are apart from your children or staying together at home:
(As always, please check that these ideas are appropriate for your age child and that their privacy is protected)
Karaoke https://karafun.com
Draw Something (draw and guess)
Catan but digital https://www.catan.com/game/catan-universe#
QuizUp (digital trivia good for older kids and teens) https://www.quizup.com/en
Minecraft https://www.minecraft.net/en-us/
Teleparty watch movies synchronously on Netflix while using chat. https://www.teleparty.com/
Trickster – play card games using this app. Several options including hearts, euchre, and spades. https://www.trickstercards.com/
Museum, Art Gallery or Aquarium virtual visits. Look at the Shedd Aquarium, https://www.youtube.com/user/sheddaquariumchicago or check this list https://www.theguardian.com/travel/2020/mar/23/10-of-the-worlds-best-virtual-museum-and-art-gallery-tours
Travel digitally by looking at webcams from faraway places. https://www.earthcam.com/
Cooking Classes for the whole family build independence skills, break the monotony of planning meals and are yummy. Look at this list for ideas https://torontolife.com/food/torontos-best-online-cooking-baking-and-drink-making-classes/